Love is not a feeling, it is not an emotion. Love is who I am. Because it is what I am. It is the reason I think of you. It is the reason I sincerely ask you: Have you ate yet? How are the kids? Your parents? Your family? How are you doing?
It is the reason that I'll make sure the coffee is made, the administrative at home is looked after, the appointments are scheduled, the trips are booked, that I am there to take the kids to all their classes.
It is the reason that I push us to make decisions to go out for breakfast, lunch, coffee or dinner together. To catch up on how our children are doing. How work has been. How our marriage / relationships are.
Everyone who enters into my orbit, into my life in whatever way or form, it means you belong in my life and have a place within my existence.
With love. True love. Genuine love. If love is who I am. I don't think that there is a possibility or a chance of being harmed, betrayed or taken advantaged of by you. I am not concerned about you overtaking what I can give. No...because if you are able to take and receive what I am giving, then it means I'm giving it willingly. If there was nothing there to begin with, what is there for you take. You cannot take what doesn't belong to you and what I do not have to offer or give to you.
So when I'm willingly, sincerely and honestly giving love, giving a part of me to you, then it means it belongs to you, and only you. When I send you a message to remind you of the beauty of this world; when I give you my undivided attention to listen to you looking after your father in the hospital; when I assist you in taking over your tasks at work so you can make arrangements to return home to bury your son; when I speak calmly to you to assure you that I will take care of it, don't worry,; when I purposely find a joke to make you laugh; when I give you tips and advice of my experience in life. This is all love. This is all me.
I use to be afraid. Afraid of the pain from the open wounds of being cut open. The suffering and torture of unreturned love. But love is like the water that goes into a water well. You have to pour water into the well, over and over and over again until you finally draw the water out of the well from a place so deep, so far beneath.
And sometimes you think, how much more do I have to give before it comes back? You don't. With love, the more you give, the more you create / find from within you or around you. Just like the endless amount of water poured into the well. One pail, two pail. You will find ways to find more water from the river, from the lake, from the ocean. And then you will notice, actually, I've already found water from so many other sources, I don't need the water from the well anymore. But I will continue to give to well because the well needs the water. Because the well needs the love.
Because my love belongs to you. Because this specific part of me belongs to you.
Will you hurt me? Betray me? Take advantage of me? Maybe....but for this to happen means that I need to expand my capacity of compassion, love and tolerance to embrace you for what you are only able to offer me. But don't worry, I'm not even remotely scared of the pain, the heartache, the darkness. Because even the dark angel with black wings and crimson tips from blood is an Angel. And an angel holds the light of love from within.
So if I am not afraid to love you, then you shouldn't be afraid of me loving you.